The Best Way to Look at Life

[Jency William]

It wasn't until I had spent my twenties searching to fulfill my 'OpinioNation' that I realized how futile my dreams and desires were - every relationship I had was invariably the same as every relationship my friends were having (whether male or female friends) - they would have good parts, bad parts, great parts and terrible parts...and they all came to an end, whether it was a week, a month, a year or a decade. And every time a relationship ended, my friends and I were left feeling disappointed, but somehow it did not stop us from trying all over again to fulfill the 'OpinioNation' we believed in.

Once I reached my thirtieth year I made a concerted effort to change my 'OpinioNation', to look at things differently, to observe the 'truth' of the situation and to try to live logically and realistically rather than idealistically chasing a fantasy that had been fed to me by my upbringing, culture and surroundings. I began to form conclusions based on facts not fiction, and I stripped away my 'OpinioNation' to reveal an easier and less constricting way of life that incorporated aspects that were all positive, workable and durable. It involved a complete re-organization of my beliefs, but it was worth it because ultimately I have found a lifestyle that makes sense on every angle, and that is positive for every aspect of my life.

In order to live realistically, I spent time alone learning about myself (good and bad), and I spent time with friends, enemies and other entities - I did not make a concerted effort to spend time with these people, but life generally throws us in the mix, and so when the opportunity arose to deal with solitude, crowds or family, I took it, and I learned from it. I grew from it, and I now have a new view that does not disregard my 'OpinioNation', it just incorporates everybody else's 'OpinioNation' too, and therefore I have found a more objective reality that I invented and that makes more sense for me because it is tailored to my needs; not the opinions, needs, desires or views of other people who came before me, who do not live my life and who have no understanding of my mind, heart or soul.

I no longer need marriage to justify a relationship - therefore when I date someone there is no ultimate agenda, and I find myself in better relationships that last longer because I have learned to be an unconditional friend and lover and I enjoy every aspect of the relationship whether it is just sexual, a bit of everything or simply parts of some emotion or other. As long as I am open to the disorganization of life, love and other people's minds, then I know that I can only gain from being with someone, and whether the relationship lasts an hour, a week, a month, a year or a decade, I know that it is a positive part of my life.