Chinese Association of Idaho State University (CAISU)
Cracks in the Masculine Armor - Can You See Them?
I believe that we often lose who we are The Ex Factor Guide Review in relationships instead of finding ourselves. This plays a large role in the lack of success of our unions. Sex or no sex before marriage is another major ideological dilemma encountered by the faithful. The Christian perspective is that monogamy should be strictly adhered to before matrimony. However, a 2006 study, which used statistics from the 1982, 1988, 1995 and 2002 National Survey of Family Growth, asked about 40,000 people ages 15-44 about their sexual behavior and traced the trends in premarital sex back to the 1950s.
Of those interviewed in 2002, 95% reported they had had premarital sex; 93% said they did so by age 30. Among women born in the 1940s, nearly nine in ten did. Does doctrine alone provide the answers to our relationship woes? A recent Time Magazine article on preacher's wives stated that the rate of divorce among the clergy is the same as the national average, 50%. Is this the work of the devil, or the lack of self work in understanding who we are in our relationships and what we really bring to them?
Then there are the contradictions of the masculine identity that characterize many relationships. Manhood today is a performance, as Jackson Katz, in the documentary film Tough Guise says, "where you only show certain parts of yourself that society has defined as manly." Consequently, many men use domination and control to compensate for the lack of authenticity in their unions.
The issues surrounding sexual orientation which are widely condemned and miscast, but rarely constructively discussed have created the climate of sexual hate and confusion that permeates the Christian church and spills out into the larger society. All of this clouds our thinking, our behavior and our choices in our relationships. Within the context of these single ministries our sexuality and spirituality remain irrevocably divided.
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